I was recently teaching a young woman how to meditate and found myself wondering whether her “depression” was actually the beginning of a spiritual awakening.
When I asked her why she wanted to learn, she shared that she’d been experiencing mild anxiety and depression for some time. She wanted to feel more peaceful inside and her counsellor recommended she give meditation a try.
What we uncovered as the session progressed, surprised both of us.
This young woman was experiencing the inner conflict and turmoil that often accompanies the process of spiritual awakening and a transition that is referred to as a “dark night of the soul.”
As her story unfolded, she told me that she had no idea who she was. The majority of her life decisions were based on what she felt she should do and not what she felt she wanted to do. She explained that she didn’t seem to fit in with many of her friends and family who were urging her to get a certain type of job in order to make a good living.
She was feeling torn between the messages that she had received about what she needed to do to be successful and what fed her deeper interests and passions.
What has this scenario got to do with awakening?
My client was beginning to feel the pull of her soul and the deeper truths about who she was at her core and her authentic self.
She was experiencing the signs arising from her soul that perhaps she wasn’t following her own path. That she needed to pause and get back in alignment with who she was and not what others were expecting of her.
The reason people awaken is because they have finally stopped agreeing to things that insult their soul.” Anonymous
She was feeling confused about the cause of her inner turmoil.
There are some who believe that the soul withdraws energy from things that aren’t meant for us.
After learning about this, this young woman had an epiphany- perhaps she wasn’t “depressed” after all. Perhaps her soul was sending her a message that she was moving in a direction that wasn’t meant for her. She was going through this “dark night of the soul” to ultimately become more fully herself. To shine her own light in the world.
She was confused by her inner restlessness and wasn’t aware of the difference between her conditioned, habitual thinking and the yearnings of her soul.
She didn’t understand that there was a life force greater than herself at work behind the scenes, creating conditions inviting her to awaken.
Are You Listening?
The truth, however, is that the majority of people who receive this invitation have no idea that it’s an invitation.
When we ignore, deny or turn our back on the invitation because we don’t see it for what it is, we often experience symptoms such as emotional issues, physical health problems, relationship challenges and jobs that don’t feel aligned.
More and more people are being called to make this shift.
Awakening is a normal part of the evolution of our consciousness.
Unfortunately, most people do not understand what’s happening. This spiritual awakening process and the accompanying “dark night of the soul” is often misunderstood. People experiencing awakening react as if there’s something wrong when in fact it’s a natural and beautiful, albeit often difficult, process of growth and change.
As we continued to explore what this awakening felt like for her, this young woman experienced a sense of relief.
She was curious about spirituality and was feeling drawn to learn more about a creative life force that she intuitively knew played a significant role in her life. She went on to explain that she found herself asking the big questions in life: What is the purpose of my life? Why am I here? Why have I suffered in my life when most of my peers seem to be happy?
All of these signs pointed to the realization that this woman was being invited to awaken.
What is Awakening?
Awakening reveals that which had previously been hidden from our view- making it a confusing time.
It involves a process whereby we shift our worldviews and begin to see things differently and more clearly.
It’s an invitation to let go of who we are not, in order to uncover who we are meant to become.
It’s about awareness and beginning to see more clearly the difference between our small self (ego) with its conditioned, habitual way of being and our essential self or our soul.
Our spiritual awakening calls us to shed the beliefs and habits that no longer serve us in order to step fully into our authentic selves.
It’s a process of unbecoming and becoming all at the same time.
In my work as a Meditation Coach and Spiritual Mentor, I’m seeing an increasing number of people who are feeling this inner urge to awaken.
This shift is creating an opportunity to look inside ourselves and find the answers in order to live in alignment with our souls.
In the following interview, I chat with Yasmin Elzomor about her awakening journey that began in her 20’s. We explore how her journey through the dark night of the soul shifted her relationships and sense of purpose in the world. It’s an inspiring interview!
***You may also find it helpful to read What Is the Purpose Of The Dark Night Of The Soul where I include an interview I did with a psychologist about her awakening journey and questioning whether or not she was “depressed.”
Please leave a comment below. Our community would love to hear from you.
(Original post, July 19, 2018; Updated June 30, 2021).
is it possible that someone on similar spiritual path is getting negative comments, reactions from people?
i have noticed that i am being calm, meditative and fine.. but poeple pass comments on me and call me depressed…
they feel someting is wrong wth me.. merely in my presence… i am simply there sitting.. and still i attract negative ppl and reactions…. today only this happened again.. i was simply there on dentist’s chair.. i didnt utter a word.. and that dentist second time called me depressed and judged me…. although i was simply calm and meditative … in my own trance.. .i felt betrayed deep inside.. bcoz positivoty also attracting negativity..? i want to know.. what would u say about it…? any idea why i always and usually attract negative comments.. even when i am not doing anything to call for it?
Thank you for your comment and for sharing your experience. The negative comments and reactions from other people are more a reflection of where they are at and not your state of consciousness. The learning for you is in becoming aware of your reaction to their feedback. Does it trigger something in you? Notice how that feels in your body? What thoughts go along with this? Get curious…
Hi Bev , I really liked reading your posts, thank you for your clear insights, I have been on a journey to find out who am I for the last two years and have learnt , grown and been more centered than before , many challenges came up which I understand was a call to shed limiting beliefs, all in all it has been a rollercoaster ride so far. Intellectually I totally understand that I am not my mind or body but I am a soul having a mind/body experience, what I dont understand is even though my brain seems to have this knowledge I still dont seem to be able to live it fully, i cannot understand what is the way I can fully let go , what does that really mean , if I am not the doer and just the instrument then am I responsible for any actions ? Does fully let go involve not having any desires but just going along with whatever is happening, craving something is wrong, but if I dont have desires what’s the point of being here in this world, if i choose not to have free will isnt that choosing an act of free will too ?
Hi Sam, Thanks so much for your insightful and thought-provoking comments and questions. I want to say that I was inspired by your journey and the work that you have been doing for the past couple of years to learn, grow and shed some limiting beliefs. That takes a lot of courage!
I and others I’m sure can relate to the “rollercoaster” ride that it feels like. You are definitely not alone with that feeling.
In terms of your questions- thank you for posting them! You make some really valuable observations.
In terms of knowing something intellectually and actually doing something different in order to fully live into a new way of being requires more than awareness alone. It’s why change is difficult even when we know we want to change.
When I’m coaching a client who wants to not only think differently but be different, we co-create a new vision which includes new beliefs, ways of doing things and ways of checking back in to see through new eyes. We then also need to build new “muscles” which are small practices that help us shift into this new way of being. In this way we take what worked for us in the past, let go of what is holding us back and evolve into a new way of being. Make sense?
In terms of your questions… Fully letting go isn’t about not having desires. Deep desires often arise from our souls and we are meant to bring those things to life. Our challenge is to determine whether these desires are arising from our ego which leads to striving, never being good enough, immediate gratification OR whether it is a desire that is arising from an intelligent Universe that wants expression through us. We become the “channel.”
Discerning which desires require action and which require observation becomes part of our spiritual practice.
I hope that helps! Please do reach out if you’d like to explore whether I can support you in building these new muscles and stepping more fully into who you’re longing to become. Thank you again!! Bev
This post and the video deeply moved me to tears. Thank you so much for putting this out for me to find. I have suffered with depression for years, though much less now. I see it’s the door through which there is a unique opportunity to be more peaceful than you can ever imagine. The noise and distractions are taken away – that’s what depression does, it takes them away until there’s nothing left but emptiness. And in that emptiness is pure silence, pure being, pure presence of self undisturbed by anything.
Hi Ruby,
Thank you for sharing that this reflection touched you deeply. You expressed so beautifully how your experience of depression opened up space for you to connect with your essence of being and presence. That’s such a hopeful and inspiring message. Thank you and much love to you, Bev
Do you have books to read
Hi Sharon,
Although I don’t have any specific recommendations on this topic, a book that comes to mind is “The Road Less Travelled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values, and Spiritual Growth” by M. Scott Peck, M.D. I invite anyone else reading this to offer a recommendation! Thanks!
Great article!
I’ve struggled with depression for many years and have ‘dabbled’ with meditation and mindfulness. I’m currently going through a particularly dark period which I put down to various life changes going on around me but am now wondering if it’s actually an awakening….
Hi Jane,
I’m glad you found the article helpful! It’s really powerful that you’re getting curious about what the experience of “depression” is pointing to. The challenging and dark times in our lives are always an opportunity for awakening to our deeper sense of self and resilience. I’m sending you much love for your journey, Bev.
Wow! I really needed to read this!!!
I thought i was going crazy or depressed!
But everything you are saying here Im going thru it exactly!
Hi Sara,
I’m so glad you read this when you most needed to hear the message! I love when that happens. I’m even more grateful to hear that you’ve realized that what you’re experiencing is a process that’s in service of connecting with your deeper more authentic self. Thank you for sharing with us here! Love, Bev
My daughter is going tru a spiritual awaking. I am so confused about this happening. She says God is talking to her (she had lost faith in God) she says she gets downloads and sometimes it is to much. She wants to help people. She says she is a empath.
Long story short. No one understands her and what she is going tru. She is lonely for she has no one to share this with like minded. She is 36 and has never been married. Longest adult relationship she was in was 4 years (somewhat toxic). Family has turned their back on her.
She quit her job and lives with us and it is a strain on my relationship with my husband (her stepfather and he is not a religious person) I am however.
She gets serious anxiety and cries. It breaks my heart that I can’t help her. She talks to a therapist which was a practicing Buddhist or something. She has gone tru some serious stuff I have witnessed. Shoot this story is a long one sorry.
So the relationship she was in, they have always kept In contact as well as me. Around July 4 2021 she had been having impending doom feelings that someone was gonna die (I had also to the point of off on on anxiety). I wrote down on paper the 5th of July that my was step dad was going to die soon or by end of year.
Any ways back to toxic boyfriend he died on the 5th of July. Very difficult on her and I because and myself. We both him even though he and her where not suited to be together.
So still my anxiety was high. Our friends dad died out of the blue, his mom was terminally ill she died 7 days after his dad (July also). Then my mother in laws best friend passed (mind you she passed on the same day my friends mom passed.
So back to my step dad I had been holding a grudge and been having overwhelming need to forgive him (he was in nursing home) my other daughter (twin to my spiritual daughter) left what she was doing went to nursing home for me so I could see him and forgive him (he looked really good so I thought he will not die soon to make myself feel better) about 4 days later he got real sick and died. Can you please offer some type of advice?
Mother in pain.
Hi Jody,
Thanks for your comment! It’s very understandable that you’re confused about what is happening and are concerned for your daughter. When people are experiencing an awakening there are times when it can become a spiritual crisis/emergency and difficult to distinguish from more of a psychological process. I’m glad to hear your daughter has the support of a therapist as there are a lot of factors to consider including the recent grief from experiencing so many losses. I’m sorry to hear of all of your losses!! Perhaps explore some resources for spiritual crisis and additional support for grief/loss. Much love to you and your daughter, Bev.
Dear Bev,
Lovely post and video and much needed to empower others on their sacred journey of soul. Therein; big thank you for being you and doing this work. It’s not easy but it is necessary.
Be love always ❤️
Thanks so much for your kind note. Love, Bev.
Beautifully and clearly written. ❤️
Thank you, Amy!
Thank you for writing this insightful article. It provided me with a detailed different perspective. Recently, I’ve come to a crossroads in my life after resigning from my job. I had severe burn out and needed a mental break. I feel unsure and stuck with my purpose in life. Things don’t feel right and I feel off path with feelings of sadness. I’ve been spending my time reading a lot of spiritual books and wanting to be around nature. I’ve also been experiencing strange but positive signs around me. I wonder if this is a spiritual awakening? Thank you again and much love.
Hi Taylor,
I’m so glad you found the article helpful and that it provided a different perspective for you. Yes, it seems from what you’ve shared you’re beginning the process of “awakening” which is often accompanied by sadness and a sense that things don’t feel right. It also sounds like you’re getting more in tune with your deeper self and developing new capacities as you read spiritual books, spend more time in nature and increase your awareness about “signs” around you. So beautiful! You talked about a “crossroad” and that’s often a challenging time when we don’t know which way to go. Give yourself the time and space you need to recover from your burn out and continue to ask for signs. Although you feel “stuck” it sounds like a lot is going on that is in service of your higher self. Much love to you as well, Bev.