Having come through a dark night of the soul I am finally able to make sense of why living a meaningful life is SO important and why I felt “stuck” figuring it out.
From the time we are born until the time we die; we have a life force energy that flows through us and animates our physical body.
This life force energy propels us to grow and evolve, much like our nails are continually growing. As Wayne Dyer said when I heard him at a live event “You cannot stop your nails from growing. You can tell them to ‘stop’ but of course they won’t.”
This same energy fuels us to continually create and express ourselves in physical form.
Depending on what our Soul needs to evolve we are all create meaning in different ways.
As long as we are living in alignment with what our Soul needs and making decisions that align with our inner wisdom, we will have a sense that we are flourishing in our lives. Our life force energy will flow!
If we stifle or constrict our life force energy OR we let outer influences determine how we are living or what should be meaningful, we end up feeling inner turmoil.
This inner turmoil is often a symptom that we are “stuck” in creating meaning in our lives and that our life force energy is blocked.
Just as our nails grow, our sense of what brings meaning to our lives is also meant to grow and evolve.
Let me give you a couple of examples:
The parent who in their younger years derived great meaning from raising their children. They had a channel for their life force energy and it was their children. The children grew up and left home. Where do they channel their energy now? How do they create meaning? They are stuck because they don’t know how to create meaning in the new season of their life!
The business person who put all their time and energy into being successful and making money to be financially secure. The majority of their life force energy is focused on achieving this. After many years, they achieve their goal. Now, where do they channel their energy? How do they create meaning? They are stuck because they don’t know how to create meaning in the new season of their life!
What happens when we are stuck?
Feeling stuck is often a really powerful sign and an invitation to do life differently. It is the Universe tapping us on the shoulder and saying, “It’s time to grow, and that means letting go of your existing way of being so that you can usher in a new way.”
For the parent who has put their energy into their children, they are now meant to channel it someplace else requiring that they create meaning in a new way.
For the business person that has achieved financial security, they are now meant to channel their energy into other things that bring meaning.
The challenge for many is that we get “stuck” because we can’t envision what this new life is supposed to look like. But feeling stuck is not actually the problem. The problem is that we don’t know how to get “unstuck” and so this life force energy that is meant to flow is blocked!
And living with our life force energy being blocked isn’t just uncomfortable, it impacts our health.
Although there are many reasons why we get “stuck” one of the biggest ones is that the masculine way of creating meaning only works to a certain point.
The masculine way of creating meaning comes from the perspective that we need to have it all figured out before we even get started. We need to set the goal and then have the path clearly defined.
We put pressure on ourselves to know what IT is that brings us meaning. And then when we know it, we can create it.
For example, when I was 18 years old, I knew I wanted to be a Nurse. With that in mind, I had a clear vision of the steps I needed to take to get there. Four years of University and I’d achieve my goal. The masculine way of creating meaning worked because I knew that Nursing would be meaningful for me.
The feminine way of creating meaning comes at it from a completely different perspective. The feminine way of creating is more of a creative process of moving forward without having it all figured out. It is a process that flows from our inner world and manifests in our outer world.
It is a journey of following the bread crumbs and course-correcting along the way based on our inner guidance. It is definitely not a linear path and feels like a journey into the unknown without a map or a final destination.
I have become really familiar with this way of creating meaning in my life as well. I can say that it is completely different than when I had it all figured out and wanted to be a Nurse.
These past eight years have been a meandering journey of trial and error.
I have been living the feminine way of creating because that is what has been required to uncover what feels deeply meaningful during this season in my life.
The challenge for many of us is that society values the masculine way of creating over the feminine way of creating. We know the masculine way and often don’t even see another way.
So, when our Soul has saturated itself with the masculine way of creating and is needing us to grow and explore the feminine way of creating, it is definitely the road less travelled.
It’s a journey into the unknown that feels uncomfortable because we don’t have it all figured out. And, when we’re being perfectly honest, we don’t really like the unknown or discomfort!
For all of you who are on the road less travelled, I am on a parallel road with you. And if you’re not on the road yet, but are feeling the inner life force energy stirring something in you, perhaps it’s your time.
Although there is a lot of uncertainty, one thing I know for sure- the road less travelled is a deeply meaningful adventure.